Screw Work, Be Social

My life for the past week or so has been roughly divided in three parts:

1.  The part where I’m super social and having lots of friends over or going out and having a good time.
2.  The part where my mum is visiting and we clean and cook together because she wants to make sure I get my deposit back. We also laugh a lot.
3.  The rest of the time where I spend entire nights on the bathmat because my bathroom is literally the most warm and comfortable place in my house. Who invented “wide open spaces” and also “single pane windows.” If I ever live in a big house (read: more than 2 bedrooms, assuming less than 2 kids) please remind me that I hate large living spaces and what the fuck am I doing with my life.

We’re going to focus on parts 1 and 2.

The delightful thing about keeping my “Gratitudes” journal is that it’s like a snapshot diary, but only of good things. So this way when I want to remember what happened, I can just look at the day and be like ::smile:: “Oh yeah, that was a pretty cool thing that happened.”

Being social, going out, having friends over and having a good time

One of the cool things that happened was that the Tenor and I made Pho. That was pretty chill. Good Panda asked me a while back to write more recipes so I wrote the recipe. It is very classically me: it will certainly point you towards making a food, but in the meantime it a work of comedy.

Pho á la Sara

Ingredients:

· 1/2 lb or so of beef. I've been using about 1/4-1/3 lb per person when I cook this. As you suggested, you could probably get it cut really thin by the butcher. I go for the cut-up steak that says "fajita" on the package. I'm lazy.

· 1/2 Tbsp butter (side of butter wrapper has tablespoons marked out)

· 1-1 1/2 Tbsp Lee Brand "Pho: Vietnamese Beef Flavor Paste" (By half I mean just use the same scoop twice and put half as much in it. It's safest to start with real measuring spoons.)

· 8 oz mushrooms, white or portabella. Can sub any kind of veg here, but I think mushrooms are a safe starter veg. Shrooms can be cut any way you like, quartered or "pizza style" or whatever. Make sure you wash those fuckers first though. They grow in poop.

· Pho noodles. I used half a 16 oz package for two people. Probably 1-1.5 oz of dry noodle per person, if you can judge it. Or just use half the package.

· 2-3 Green onions

· half a fistful of cilantro. Sara sized fist, not Tenor sized fist. Probably a quarter of a Tenor fist. Haha. I never noticed how funny the word fist is. Fist. Whatever, cilantro is for garnish. If you cilantro (or parsley or celery) ever looks sad because it's dry, put the stem bits in water. They'll perk up in an hour.

· 1 jalepeño pepper, cut in 1/4 in slices. More if you want more spiciness. DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE OR ANY OTHER ORIFICES. Just don't.

· Sriracha (cock sauce) and plum sauce to season

Cooking instructions:

1.     Heat saucepan/pot (big enough for all the soup) to medium heat. Add butter, moving it around pan/pot by either rocking pot or moving it around with a set of tongs. Butter should be bubbly but not burn-y. Lower heat if butter is doing nothing but bubble. It should just hang out as a delicious liquid, occasionally bubbling.

2.     Add the steak bits. [As previously stated, this is Sara-Pho not restaurant-pho. In a restaurant they add the meat at the very last step because the high surface area allows it to cook in the broth.] Brown steak bits on all sides. This means allowing the bits to sit on one side for about 5 minutes or until brownish-grey in appearance. 

3.     Remove steak bits from pan and put on plate.

4.     Add water to pot so pot is about half full.

5.     Add Pho paste.

6.     Cover pot and leave on medium heat to boil. Boiling takes a while.

7.     Chop up your mushrooms, if you haven't done that already. If you're The Tenor, make loud choppy noises for no reason on the cutting board. ;-)

8.     While waiting three and half days to boil, chop up the green things. Put in mugs like a classy person to ornament your Pho. Or remikens. Or other small dishes.

9.     Add cut up mushrooms to broth when it starts to boil (bubbles around edges). Stir frequently but keep covered.

10.   As broth comes to a rolling boil (it's always bubbling, there aren't any calm patches) add your noodles. That should make the broth calm the fuck down for a bit. Noodles should cook 2-5 minutes but check the package for specific details.

11.   Noodles are done with they're squishy. Check texture by tasting it. Once desired squishiness is achieved, turn off heat.

12.   Serve broth with noodles into a comically oversized and mismatched bowl.

13.   Add meat, green toppings and hot/sweet sauce as you like. Keep in mind that jalepeños continue to cook as they're left in broth so just take them out when you're done with them.

Traditionally (restaurants) will give you bean sprouts with your toppings. Since we live in TLoTH, I couldn't find any fresh bean sprouts. The Outdoorsy Sage suggests pea sprouts that can be found at the store far away. I am a derp at finding them though, so here we go, sans bean sprouts!

AND THEN EAT YOUR BEAUTIFUL SOUP!

(Picture of Pho from a previous iteration, mostly to illustrate the hilariously 3 little bears-eque bowls I own.)

Another night, I went over a friend’s house and discovered my coat was full of spiders. Like, literally I had no bites and all of a sudden my shoulders were COVERED in spider bites. Fortunately this friend had a washing machine in her kitchen and she was kind enough to let me use this washing machine. I think I showered for 45 minutes when I got home. I felt like I was in A Scanner Darkly for the entire next day.

Besides that, dinner was AMAZING, the company was good and the wine…well it was Pinot Noir. So of course I had to introduce the friends to Peeno Noir. Because Titus Andromedon. We also looked up Hawaiian Superman which is pretty funny as a song. The hostess friend also made candy geodes and later gave me one. BEST. It is super-saturated sugar syrup dried out on fondent. Literally sugar on sugar. I took tiny little bites and had to eat a chip between each one. My taste buds are still confused.

Adventures picking up Mum 

Retrieving Mum from the airport was an interesting exercise in patience. The plane didn’t make the original connection that meant poor Mum stayed up for almost 24 hours straight. Fortunately I had some good friends (The Jr. Ranger and a new friend: Tall Dark and Handsome [TDH]) drive with me to airport (90 min away) so I wouldn’t fall asleep or have panic attacks on the drive home. Before picking Mum up from airport, I dragged them to a Polish restaurant. TDH was hilarious. He had never had Polish, or German or Russian food. There was a portion of the drive down when he kept asking if there were possibly hamburgers. But he was very brave and tried a plate of perogies. I got what they called a “Russian Roulette” of perogies. The Jr. Ranger was very comfortable ordering stuffed cabbage. She and I traded halves and all the food was super yummy and delicious. We brought down the house and the owner kicked us out at 9 pm. But he was SO nice about it. He was like…I’m really sorry to kick you out so have some reusable bags and a couple candy bars!

When Mum finally did arrive, we got this really sad message “lost my luggage”. So I immediately (as immediately as possible, airports are hard) parked. I walked into where she was talking to the attendant and walked up quietly behind her. As soon as I came into view I said “Here is some chocolate. It will make everything better.” Of course at some point I hugged her and told her I was glad I was safe, but chocolate is priority in these situations. I also gave some chocolate to the poor woman who had to deal with an entire flight of lost luggages.

Saturday was a bit of a drag because Mum was exhausted. Like a good daughter, I left her at home and went out partying on my own that night. I had a BLAST. I went to a board game group where I got to be a Viking and buy sheeps and stuff to build boats. I was surprised I liked that game.

Then the Jr Ranger, The Mexican and me went to go dance. The little beer co-op in town occasionally brings in a live DJ and they spin for a couple hours. On Saturday it wasn’t crowded so we got to dance around and have such a great time. I danced for 2 hours straight. Need to do that more! One thing this “club” had going for it was that there wasn’t any creepy grinding or leering. Even though this town is tiny, I have to give it mad props for pulling off a safe space to dance. That’s pretty damn difficult to do.

Sunday morning was derby practice as usual. For the first time, I actually participated in the full 2 hour practice. Mum sat on the side watching. Once we started to scrimmage my teammates called out to her “Ozone Mom, come inside the ring so you don’t get hurt!” I thought it was adorable.

Then, for the first time, I got to jam!!! The sport of derby is basically the story of 1 (jammer) against 4 (blockers). Jammer has to pass blockers. Blockers have to prevent jammer from getting by. So for the first time, I went up against 4 big strong women and tried to wrestle my way through their wall. It was exhausting but exhilarating and so much fun. I had some pretty good momentum built up and then someone shouted out “Take the hole. Make a hole in the Ozone!” I lost it. I cracked up so badly that I totally forgot what I was doing. It had somehow never occurred to me that choosing my name would lead to that exact pun.

Anyway, if it had been a real bout (match) I would have gotten 3 points, out of 5 possible. DO WANT MOAR. I’m gonna go work out all the time now so I have enough strength to do that again! Maybe another day though, my mum is still here and I have to do stuff with her that isn’t working out.

Hanging out with Mum

I have considerably less adventurous stuff to share about having my Mum here. We have mostly been cooking and cleaning together. We’ve had: Seared tuna with asparagus and rice, ratatouille with gorgonzola and chicken soup so far. We have had a lot of laughs over silly things like excessive spoons in tea and waking up at 4:30 am to tell me it’s snowing. We’ve had a lot of discussions about our identities and how they overlap and don’t. It’s made me very happy that she noted I am definitely her daughter and my Bubba’s granddaughter because I keep two towels for showering (one for hair) and fold my clothes like a retail person. We’ve talked about family and health and very little about politics. I introduced her to Gravity Falls and Hayo Miyazaki and The IT Crowd. I have been particularly appreciative that Mum has pointed out traits in my friends that may be difficult for me to see. This is very helpful as I’m assessing who are good influences and whom I want to keep in my life after this year. And also what kinds of traits are non-useful. To be fair, she’s only been here for 4 full days so we’ve done a lot. My apartment is considerably cleaner now.

To close out, Mum and I chose this version of this song. The original song’s music video is pretty far out there and we agreed this was more…entertaining. Please pardon the speaking parts. Except that the speaking parts have a guest appearance by Erlich Bachmann and Gilfoyle so they’re worthwhile for that!

Becoming

It occurs to me that I haven’t actually written to you, my beautiful readers, in two weeks. I think I felt last week that I didn’t really have anything to say, so I let Dr. Bow take it away.

“Not really having anything to say” is not really the case. I feel like my life has been a close race between me running away from my depression and it catching up. This is my last week living alone, hopefully for a long time. One major advantage that I have found is that if I am feeling unable to mentally get up the effort to do anything, I have explored some rather deeper wounds than I wouldn’t otherwise poke at. It is painful, but I have had whole days where I don’t have to answer to anyone. I have been able to feel. Completely. There is some freedom in that.

I actually don’t want to talk about the times depression has caught up but if you’re available to talk to me on the phone, please let me know. It’s been a month since I went to the Key Route City and I’ve forgotten that it’s OK to call people and ask for support. And just to clarify, I am getting treatment for depression. But the therapist is rather meh for my needs. Meds are still working but I don’t take them all too often (they’re on an “as needed basis” I’m not goin’ off them randomly).

But the things I’ve been doing to run away from my depression have been rather amusing and awesome. So I’ll talk about them!

Work

I’ve finally been given the go ahead to actually get work done. I’ve done interpretations for 70 sets of data and consolidated 14 sets onto one page, then into one chart. Both mentors called me competent and one even said “This is nice, I like this.” I have been going through all of the relevant literature and drawing reasonable but big conclusions. I am demonstrating that I am a good scientist.

It feels very different. I feel strong.

But I also forget how to be social if I do too much deep thinking so it becomes awkward that I'm surrounded by people with their social brains on. I am a social social person so this experience is weird. I guess in all of my experience until now I've only gotten this focused when I write papers or study for finals and in those circumstances, everyone understands to fuck off. It's different in corporate world, but they expect similar results.

Derby

I am getting steadier on my skates every time I go for it. My teammates continue to be supportive, inclusive and encouraging. I was invited to a board meeting that was fairly interesting and had free cupcakes and cookies. It’s really interesting to see what are the broad and long-term goals of any organization.

The best part was that we had a scrimmage! It was Friday night and I was asked to be a scorekeeper. The women I train with were mostly on one team together and it was AMAZING to see how well they did. I was so full of pride and happiness that they played well. Everyone from my league played a very clean game and still kicked ass, beating the other league 105-76.

The second scrimmage was for more advanced skaters but that game was rather overwhelming, faster and dirtier than the first. I get the impression that it doesn’t always go that way, but it’s not uncommon. Ah well. One of my friends was a ref so I got to work with her to keep score, which was cool. Actually playing derby has a lot of people who are either refs or what’s called NSO or Non Skating Officials. Almost more officials than skaters! Hear that Mum? You could still participate in a derby league even if you can’t skate. :P Somewhat related: my mum is coming out this week to visit and my derby team mates have decided to try to get her on skates. Teeeeheeeheee.

After the scrimmage our team all went to the bar. My teammates got to see me drunk which is…a treat. As a different friend who happened to be at the bar says, I was in rare form. Happy drunk Sara is so much more pleasant and amusing than Sad or Serious or Honest drunk Sara. I just dance around a bunch and hug people. Including the bartender. He paid for my drink. Benevolent sexism, ftw.

Now for the interesting bits.

Adventures

President’s day is always a weird “holiday”. I’ve mostly been celebrating that day, and all other days by listening to the soundtrack of Hamilton nonstop. I still can’t get over how much DRAMA they packed into that score.

Anyway, I actually went for adventures that day. New character!! Her name is the Jr. Ranger. She started out as a loose acquaintance but now she basically lives at my house. She’s the kind of person who suggests things to do and doesn’t make me do all the planning all the time. I like her. She’s also pretty easygoing so that’s nice.

The Jr. Ranger, the Tenor and I went on an early morning adventure to some hot springs. The Tenor commented that he likes going places with me because I just talk nonstop about what’s going on outside the window. I’m like a pocket encyclopedia of rocks. #winning

It was SOOOOO COOL to see water rushing through a frozen river. There are these little pools with botryoidal icicles that end abruptly where the water whooshes through. Then there are frozen baby waterfalls with an occasional trickle over the edge. It sounds different too. Hushed, like it’s hiding something. You don’t fool me, creek. I know you’re hiding hypothermia.

As we went uphill towards the hot springs it was so cool to see bright little green sprouts of plants. They looked like an enchanted carpet, next to a giant boulder of obsidian covered in cold looking lichens. Up at the hot pools themselves it was not terribly warm. Instaregret about being in my bathing suit in 30°F weather. But I knew there was a little cave where the water was a lot closer to bathwater. We mostly hung out in there, and it surprisingly was roomy enough for 2 people and a third person’s feet. I have to say, that place is a LOT less spooky during daylight. Last time I was there was with Sam G and it got dark while we were there. Dark=spooky. It was actually really beautiful and peaceful the whole time this time around. And the sun peeked through just long enough for me to warm up. The one benefit of obsidian (especially old, rounded obsidian) is that it’s black and warm.

Me and the Jr. Ranger went to my place and hung out a bit, then decided to go on more adventures. Because that’s how we do. We found this landmark that was behind an adobe wall/fence with bits of dull rebar sticking out at random intervals. She was all like “that’s a silly deterrent” and I was like “yes, it is.” I then tried to get up on the adobe wall/fence and biffed it, right on the rebar. Turns out adobe and rebar are REALLY good deterrents for trespassing. At least for someone who can’t parkour hardcore. I have the most epic bruise/cut in the world on my leg now. I also finally fit into my favorite pair of teal pants after months of not fitting in them. And now those pants have a rebar shaped hole in them. ^___^

Other things….

Oh yes. I put a hole in my ear. Intentionally.

I have been the best at holding people’s hands while they get things pierced. I went with two of my derby teammates to get things pierced. During the first excursion I decided: Y’know what? After 6 years without my upper cartilage pierced, I still want an earring there. Easiest regret to fix. I am so pleased with this decision. It’s a 16 gauge ball-suspension-ring deal. It felt really amazing to take ownership of my body and do something I really wanted. It’s not that I don’t usually have ownership, I just don’t usually go for something that…altering of my appearance.

Finally, the biggest thing that’s transpired since I last wrote to you:

I MET AMANDA FUCKING PALMER AND NEIL GAIMEN. And their baby, whose head is really soft.

This is the best advice a complete stranger has ever given me. Feels extra cool coming from the guy who wrote Sandman too. And I don’t even think I remembered to babble about how much I love his writing. I was brave though and gave them both my card and asked them to please watch my TEDx talk.

It was really amazing and they were really lovely people. I liked that part best, that they were just people who happen to be very successful in their professions. The book they signed is a new journal I started this past week. Every night I write down three things that happened that day that I’m grateful for. Then I share these gratitudes with Good Panda who shares hers with me. It makes for a different kind of connection since we usually talk about our sad or frustrating or scary things that happen to us. It lets us know that there are other things in our lives.

To close out, a song Palmer played to open the event that I feel pretty much encapsulates how I feel the rest of the time when the depression catches up. I hope to come to the resolution she comes to at the end but I’m still working on it. (And Amanda, if you’re reading this please know you are the only artist whose music I’ve ever posted TWICE on this blog. The second Bowie song was a cover and therefore doesn’t count, Dad.)

And then GET THIS, PEOPLE. Someone made a Geology music!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!! Here it is!!!!!!

There, and back again

This week's post has a guest author. Niece #1 is visiting us for a little bit and I thought it would be a good experience for her to try writing a blog. As always, please be compassionate when commenting.

The past few days with PartnerPenguin and SaraBe have been ones I won’t forget for a long time. I’m from Bore City, USA, and life can be a little dull there. I was absolutely excited when I found out I’d be spending some time with them. I reached some other destinations before finally settling with them, but these days have definitely been different. I was staying with my relatives nearby before this leg of my trip. Their house/farm was unlike any other place I’d been. Ducklings, chicks, rabbits, roosters, turkeys, fish, chickens, and a friendly doggie all became acquainted with me on that stay. I didn’t stay there long, however, because Sara and PartnerPenguin arrived shortly after I arrived. Everyone joined together that evening over some scrumptious local dinner food. I won’t forget the happy feeling of watching so many cool friends of mine finally get to meet. A little unluckily, we didn’t leave until sunset for our trip to Phoenix. It wasn’t that much of a problem; we were just all a little tired by the time we got there. Although the trip was almost entirely in the dark, it was a road trip I’ll never forget. I’ve got to say, “Comfortably Numb” sounds better going down the freeway at 90 MPH. The best aspect of the trip was getting to see the meteor shower. This wasn’t your typical shower of fire in the night sky; it was a new moon that night, in the middle of nowhere. We got to see everything. I saw at least six meteors in the brief time we spent gazing. Around 3 o’clock in the morning did we finally find ourselves in Phoenix. The AirB&B we stayed at was the coolest! There was all sorts of fascinating things: spiritual quotes on the walls, Celtic designs, Native American artwork, some pretty sweet lizards, and a very generous woman named Diane. A lot of cool experiences came out of our short stay. We got to spend a lot of time with PartnerPenguin’s family, which was the reason of our visit in the first place. His Aunti Kutzi arrived from Europe around the same time I got to my relatives’. The people in the Paprikás krumpli Family were very diverse in personality. I won’t go into specifics, but the people I met were very fun to be around and it was nice to temporarily be a part of the Paprikás krumplis. I’ll never forget playing the Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone Trivia Game with SaraBe and PartnerPenguin “What is the name of the spell that paralyzes the opponent?” We said: “Habeas Corpus!” Our voting rights have been revoked. Outside of the family, Sara and I got to do a lot of exciting activities in the city. We looked around the Wells Fargo Museum, which is actually a lot cooler than it sounds. There was a lot of historical information on how important the bank was during the Gold Rush. Lots of interactive aspects were added to the museum.  We then proceeded to the Arizona Science Center. We got to learn a lot of cool facts about the human body (the brain especially), homebuilding, geology, electricity, physics, and more. For at least twenty minutes or more, SaraBe and I got to watch a Malaysian Dead Leaf Mantis consume ten or so flightless fruit flies. It was really intense. We attended a yoga class the next day, which helped clear out a few mental mothballs. It was a little hard, not being flexible and all, but we can both say that we enjoyed it. Before the three of us realized, it was time to head home. We spent the entire next day on the road trip back. We took the “scenic route”, which was absolutely gorgeous. I’d never been surrounded by such beautiful mountains while having such an intense discussion about Harry Potter. When lunchtime came around, we stopped at a cute little café, which had rather delicious burgers. Our next eating experience wouldn’t be as enjoyable. So we took off from the café, and we got to see all sorts of cool geography. The three of us got to drive through tall, forested mountains and glide along grassy plateaus. Around sunset we visited Petrified National Forest and Painted Desert. What I saw was unlike anything before.  The blotches of color spread across vast canyons and mountains were simply amazing. The Petrified Wood had such a unique texture, almost like plastic! The array of colors in the wood was so cool. We saw the most beautiful sunset on our way out of the park, as well. The sunset is one beautiful thing that I never get tired of. The rest of the trip was spent in the dark, and SaraBe and I watched Gravity Falls and snuggled. It was very fun. You were probably wondering what food we ate that was just so, so bad. We had six tacos amongst the three of us: two chicken, two beef, and two pork. Let me put this lightly… the chicken tasted although it came from a packet that was seasoned with (insert sad word), the ground beef was definitely not an Earth creature, and the pork softly wept with every bite I took.  The sadpapilla (a tortilla with kraft honey packet) brought tears to my eyes. It was a hilarious meal and I would never, ever eat there again. After a few more hours driving, we finally found ourselves back home. Those few days were some of the most unique in my life, and I would do it all again if I could. 

Here is a song we liked from the many we listened to along the road:

If You’re Not Scared for Your Life, You’re not Having Fun

It’s been a pretty interesting week. Where things left off, I was pretty bummed out. I appreciate all of the calls and emails of support. I’m sorry if I didn’t get my shit together to call you back. Monday through Wednesday was pretty routine and mostly involved cleaning up my apartment and getting ready for my brother to arrive. Thursday was the 1.5 hr drive down after crossfit. Met up with some acquaintances at some really weird bar that tried to be a biker bar and a Hard Rock Café while also being family friendly at the same time. It was really really strange but the music was good so whatever.

Brother arrived at middle-of-the-night-thirty and fortunately he drove us the hour and a half to “home”. Surprisingly, we talked the whole time. He’s trying to get out to Antarctica and I’m trying to get several things published. We still find each other funny and like similar things. It’s weird and pleasant to have my brother so present in my life for the first time in nearly a decade.

I was super dead at work on Friday but fortunately we had a lot of pushing small rocks through holes to do. Friday night, we tried some local food that consisted of fried squares of dough dipped in honey-whipped butter. It was most excellent. On our way back up to TLoTH, we stopped by a spooky but beautiful overlook. It has a nice cement platform with railings to overlook the river. Of course, we go on the narrow path that follows the narrow ridge of the cliff instead. It’s boulder-y basalt with TONS of millipedes and only a few places to put feet. I make little whining noises the whole time and Brother says:

“If you’re not scared for your life, it’s not fun.” Foreshadowing.

OK, cool so we have decided by this point that we are going to climb the highest peak in the state on Saturday by this point so we have to go buy food. Food shopping makes me exhausted but apparently it’s not acceptable to go to bed at 9:30 on a Friday night when friends have invited you out so we went to the bar. Brother met some of my friends here and that was about it.

Saturday morning, we did not get a very early start. We left around 7 am, which put us in the nearest town to the peak at 9ish. We didn’t get up to the base of the trail until 9:45. The plan was to hike the 6 mi trail to the crest, down 2 mi to a lake and meet one of my co-workers to camp the night. I didn’t quite have the right gear but it would work out if I had a tent I could crash in. (My ground pad was my yoga mat. I could almost hear it whimpering and saying it’s a domestic yoga mat, not an adventurous one.) Cool. Trail. Hiking. Very adventure. Wow.

The trail started as a horse trail. Horse trail means horse poop so there were MILLIONS of flies. It was forested and verdant and nice until the top of the first ridge. Then it alternated between beautiful alpine meadows and lush pine forest. The meadows had every wildflower I’ve ever seen in this state! There were purple ones and white ones and yellow ones. There were little scarlet ones that looked like raspberries. There were little glaciers with wind whipped patterns. There were waterfalls and creeks and moss. It was very beautiful and very happy and very quiet.

We didn’t see any bighorn sheeps but we saw a bajillion marmots. They may really odd noises, kinda like a baby crying while also trying to poop out a Lego. They’re fat and don’t look like they should be fast but they are. I guess they’re kinda cute if you like molting teddy bears?

The rocks were mostly metamorphic so there were lots of cool minerals and I think some rhodochrosite? Brother had hiked a nearby mountain a couple years ago so it was pretty cool to watch it come into focus the higher and higher we went. I started being more and more ok with silence as the hike wore on because I couldn’t breathe. We got to the peak around 5 pm unscathed, which was really a stroke of pure luck. It’s monsoon season here and we only got sprinkles and no lightening.

We descended down the path to the rendezvous. It was an unfortunately steep and bare talus slope. The best part was an adorable rodent with big round ears. Other than that, it was a treacherous and wobble-leg journey.

At the lake, I checked my phone and my co-worker had bailed. No tent, boo. It was already cool and it was only 7 pm. We ate some ramen, which was the best idea ever. By this point it was obvious one of us would freeze if we stayed the night. We asked some other hikers how far back it was to the road, they said “Oh, not far. Maybe thirty, forty-five minutes.” LIES. But we didn’t know that. We had at least 30 minutes left of sun so we figured, OK. Ten minutes in dark is better than freezing next to this glacial lake. We set out on the trail back to the road.

The light only lasted 20 minutes but fortunately Brother had a flashlight and a headlamp. We lost all light after 40 minutes but fortunately we picked up cell signal so we could see how far from the road we were. I was babbling at this point, partially out of fear of bears and mountain lions and partially because I babble when I’m scared. It was noise, so it was good. I was walking even slower than my usual slow because I’d walked 13 mi already with 3500’ up and down. Also it was dark and I fall on paved road.

The small path we were on intersected with what must have been a jeep trail. It was slightly easier to walk but I couldn’t pick up the pace that much. Around this time, Brother says “was that a flashlight?” and I kinda pause.

“Hullo? Hullo? Is anyone there?” he says. He is standing still, looking at something across the clearing. ::heartrate raises:: Brother turns to me. “Look, you need to trust me right now and we need to get out of here as soon as possible. Just run.” Well shit. (My heart is racing as I’m writing this.) I run, which was not the best thing to do in this situation. But I had no idea what was there so I just blindly ran for my life. A couple times I couldn’t breathe but I pushed past it. We saw a structure, a large mess hall of sorts. Brother said “here” and we went inside. As soon as we get in he says, “OK, we’re going to stay here the rest of the night. That was a mountain lion.” I couldn’t breathe. I started having the most legitimate panic attack of my life. Brother gets me water and tells me to focus on my breathing; he is going to check the door. He goes outside, headlamp on and all I hear is “Hey! Hey!” followed by his headlight going out. I freak out worse and can’t breathe again. I walk to window and see a jeep outside, he had just gone over to talk to them. When he comes in, he says there’s a bar just 200 ft away and there will be someone there who can drive us back to our car (another 2 mi away).

We pick up our packs and go to the little bar. The bartended makes me some tea and Brother fills us all in on some details. It was a full-grown adult mountain lion, about 7 ft long and probably 200 lb of muscle. It was less than 20 feet from us, and lions don’t show themselves unless they want to. =pouncing distance.

Update: I found out much later my brother got a picture.

When we got back to the car I called PartnerPenguin and told him I loved him. Then we got ice cream cones and came back to TLoTH.

Comparatively, the rest of the weekend was dull. We hiked to some pretty cool warm springs on Sunday. They were beautiful and clear and had little fishies that ate off the dead skin on your feet/legs/back/hands/whatever was in the water. I’ve never been in warm springs cool enough to support macroscopic life so it was super cool to me. We followed this up with some good ol’ Chinese Food buffet (tasted generic). Then we got me some proper gear so we can do a two-night overnight next weekend.

In other news, I’m continuing to work on my TEDx talk. Pressure mounts, 8 days left to showtime. Worked with a volunteer for 2.5 hr today revising my script, which makes me nervous so close to go time. I think the theme of this visit is exhaustion and fear coupled with insanely beautiful views and catharsis of being alive.

This is about the only song relevant to this event. Mostly for the chorus.